Trauma Button A Paradox Live Fansite
LIVE - Part 2
[sfx: wind blowing, distant vehicle noise]
Shiki: [deep breath] ... Nayuta-kun... I don't know if you're still here or not... but... I figure, if you're going to be anywhere, you'll be here... ... I'm still not sure I believe it myself, but... the Nayuta was taking part in the Paradox Live... was just an illusion... that Kanata-kun made... so... when we met again on this rooftop... you couldn't remember me at all. Nayuta-kun... you kept me a secret from Kanata-kun... it wasn't that you couldn't remember me... you didn't know me at all. ... but... that doesn't change what I did... I don't deserve to call myself your friend. I was so scared it might make you hate me if I said anything, so I didn't try to stop you even when I heard about the dangerous job you'd been taking... in the end, I was only thinking about myself... it was the same that night...


[flashback begins]

Nayuta: I'm... glad I met you, Shiki. [voice breaking] It was fun. Thank you.
Shiki: Nayuta-kun! Hey! It's dangerous-- hurry! Come down from there!
Nayuta: I'm sorry. I really am weak... I couldn't do it alone... but... I've decided that this is where it's going to end. ... Shiki, you're the only person who knows about this place.
Shiki: Nayuta-kun-- no, no, you can't...!
Nayuta: [deep breath] ... the sky... is so pretty.
Shiki: Nayuta-kun!!!

[flashback ends]


Shiki: ... [crying] I'm so sorry... I'm so sorry, Nayuta-kun... I... I really am a coward... I was so scared... when I saw the erosion on your arm... I thought it was terrifying... but if I'd had the courage, back then, to reach out and take your hand... would you... have taken it...? Could I... have saved you...?
Kanata: ... what... do you mean by that?
Shiki: ...! Kanata-kun...?
[sfx: Kanata's footsteps]
Kanata: ... you knew Nayuta? You were here that night?
Shiki: ...!
Kanata: Tell me! About what happened! Tell me everything!


Kanata: ... so... Nayuta killed himself...
Shiki: ... yes... because he couldn't stop the erosion from spreading... he didn't want to let you see him like that... so... he committed... [shuddering] I... I don't know if I have the right to say this, but... Nayuta-kun... he always loved you, Kanata-kun. To the point that it was heartbreaking. He loved you with his whole heart. ... I could't... stop Nayuta-kun... from jumping... maybe... Nayuta-kun was longing for the sky... but I just... ran away... from my one and only friend... maybe he was still breathing...! But I couldn't even bring myself to check! I just...! And... since that day... I just kept running away. From Nayuta's corpse... I murdered my friend and left him all alone... but... I realized... running from reality... isn't that just as bad as killing Nayuta-kun all over again?
Kanata: ...!
Shiki: So I... I had to overcome my weakness... I became a phantom rapper. This rosary is my phantometal. It's a charm to help me... learn how to confront my sins. I still can't do it, but... I hope, maybe, one day, I can be friends with Nayuta-kun again...
Kanata: ... thank you.
Shiki: Eh?
Kanata: For being friends with Nayuta. ... for not letting him be alone.
Shiki: That's... no, Nayuta-kun was... I--
Kanata: You're not the one who killed him. That was the people who did phantometal experiments on him.
Shiki: ...!
Kanata: And anyway... I ran away from it, too. We're the same.
Shiki: Eh?
Kanata: ... heh... I just couldn't accept that he was dead. In order to protect myself, I just selfishly created another Nayuta. That's running away, too.
Shiki: Kanata-kun...
Kanata: ... ahhhh. Saying that, I feel a lot better now. ... I feel like I could just end it all now.
Shiki: Eh--? End... it all...?
Kanata: I'm already quitting hip hop. I may as well skip town, too.
Shiki: You ca--
Kanata: I'm sure you already heard that I backed out of the final battle. I told BAE they can face Buraikan. They'll probably turn it down, but... Heh. That's not really my problem.
Nayuta: But...
Kanata: I can't do it anymore.
Shiki: Huh...?
Kanata: The phantom Nayuta. I can't make him appear anymore. Ever since I found out that he was dead... no matter how hard I try, he won't appear.
Shiki: Kanata-kun...
Kanata: So cozmez is disbanding. The end! I've got nothing left in me!
Nayuta: The end? But s'gonna be a real pain in the ass for me if you're gonna up and disband us.
Shiki: --!
Kanata: ...! Nayu...ta...?
Nayuta: Is something wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost.
Kanata: ... but... you're... you're dead...
Nayuta: Am I?
Kanata: Are you a phantom!?
Nayuta: ... I don't think so. I mean, look. I've got legs, not a ghost tail or anything. So I'm not a ghost or a phantom.
Shiki: N-Nayuta-kun...? Are you... really... the real Nayuta-kun?
Nayuta: Sure am. The one and only Yatonokami Nayuta.
Kanata: ... but... there's no way--
Nayuta: If you don't believe me, then go ahead and feel. Here.
[sfx: Nayuta putting Kanata's hand on his chest]
Kanata: ...!
Nayuta: My heart's beating, right?
Kanata: Y...yeah...
Nayuta: That's right. It's still beating.
Kanata: ...
Nayuta: ... mm. I'm not an illusion.
Kanata: ... Nayuta... you really... are Nayuta, aren't you...?
Nayuta: How many times am I gonna have to s--
Kanata: Nayuta!
[sfx: Kanata hurling himself at Nayuta]
Nayuta: --! ... Kanata...
Kanata: [sobbing] What the fuck...! This entire time... you asshole...!
Nayuta: ... I heard everything, Kanata. About the time when I was gone. ... I heard it all. About the Paradox Live. And the stage battles. And how you fought all alone. [voice breaking] Kanata... [crying] ... you've been trying really hard, Kanata.
Kanata: ...
Nayuta: But... you're not alone anymore. From now on, I'm gonna always be with you. This time. I won't let go. I promise. ... I'm so sorry... for disappearing on you...
Kanata: [ugly crying]
Nayuta: I'm so sorry... it must have been so hard on you... I'm sorry... for leaving you all alone...
Kanata: [crying] ... you idiot...
Nayuta: [crying] ... yeah. I'm an idiot, huh?
Kanata: Don't fuck with me...! Goddammit!
Nayuta: But... I came home. ... I'm home, Kanata.
Kanata: ... 'lcome home, Nayuta...


Nayuta: Mmm... I've told you everything I can up to the present, but there's a lot I can't remember. That night... after I jumped off the roof... they took me to a hospital. ... or, rather than a hospital, it was more like an Alter Trigger research facility.
Kanata: You mean about the Alter Trigger company?
Shiki: ... they're the ones behind the Paradox Live, aren't they...? But I thought they'd been dissolved after people started blaming them for some kind of accident...
Nayuta: Seemed to me like they were still doing research on phantometal at the facility I was at. They were the ones who offered to pay me in exchange for letting them run experiments on me.
Shiki: Then... Nayuta-kun, you were...
Kanata: Goddammit... those motherfuckers were using you like some kind of fucking lab rat!
Nayuta: Mm... maybe, but I'm pretty sure that's why I'm still alive. They clearly thought I was some kind of really important specimen. I fell into a coma, and it seems like while I was out they made a whole lot of money. So, as a result... look.
[sfx: Nayuta pulling up his sleeve]
Nayuta: My arm's all better.
Shiki: ... you're right...! There's not even any sign of the discoloration from the erosion...!
Nayuta: Right? I don't really get it, but I'm not gonna complain.
Shiki: ... I'm so glad... I really am so glad...
Nayuta: Heh. Anyway, I felt better when I woke up. Way better than I ever did before. ... so you can stop making that face now, Kanata.
Kanata: ... yeah...
Nayuta: It wasn't those guys who woke me up, anyway. It was you, Kanata.
Kanata: Eh?
Nayuta: That day... I heard your song. I heard your soul.
Kanata: ...
Nayuta: I heard you calling out to me. If you hadn't been there... I'd probably have just kept sleeping forever in that bed. Even the doctor said it was a miracle that I woke up.
Kanata: ...
Nayuta: After that scandal broke[1], the facility I was being kept in was discovered, so they had to dissolve, but... I still had to stick around so they could monitor me and make sure I was recovering, so I couldn't leave right away. ... but, I mean, I'm just making excuses... ... I know it's coming a bit late, but. Sorry. I've been wanting to apologize, Shiki. My selfishness hurt you a lot. ... I really am... really sorry.
Shiki: Nayuta-kun...
Nayuta: ... back then. Because we were friends, I... depended on you. But that wasn't fair of me. If I'd really been your friend, I--
Shiki: It's fine! It's fine, Nayuta-kun. Back then... I lost you without knowing anything at all. I couldn't carry any of that weight for you. It wasn't you who was being unfair... it was me... I just stood by and watched you die... I... so, I... just knowing you're alive... I'm so happy... I couldn't possibly ask for any more than that...
Nayuta: ... Shiki...
Shiki: So... I want to say it, too... welcome home, Nayuta-kun.
Nayuta: ... I'm back, Shiki. ... [laughs] ... ah... Kanata... I know it's more than a bit overdue, but let me introduce you guys. This is Shiki. He's my friend.
Kanata: Ah... oh...
Shiki: ... it's... nice to meet you.
Kanata: ... yeah... ... s'nice.
Shiki: Y...yeah. It is. [small laugh]
Nayuta: [chuckle] Hey, Kanata.
Kanata: Huh?
Nayuta: Let's fight back. One more time. Together.
Kanata: Fight who?
Nayuta: The final battle with Buraikan.
Kanata: ...
Nayuta: I'm not gonna let all your effort go to waste. You won, Kanata! Who cares how you did it? A win is a win. If anyone wants to argue that, I'll sew their mouth shut.
Kanata: Nayuta...
Nayuta: So, let's do it, Kanata. As a new, reborn cozmez! Let's take on that final battle.
Kanata: A reborn cozmez...
Nayuta: Mm? What? Are you scared?
Kanata: No way.
Nayuta: I already knew that. Your music is the best. I know it'll reach people. Just like it reached me. [laugh] I don't care if they're kings or legends. Let's kick their asses, and become the new kings!
Kanata: Yeah. Let's take the top and get out of this shitty world. Together.
Nayuta: Kanata.
Kanata: Nayuta.
Kanata and Nayuta: If we're together, we're unbeatable!

[1] It's a little unclear what exactly happened, but it's implied both by the tracks and by some Twitter stuff that there was a bit of a scandal between Vibes and Live. I am editing this page in the wake of the anime which does show this but is also incompatible with the dramas in a lot of ways so I need to figure out how to talk about that. Leave me alone I'll come back to that. [Back]

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